I thought I'd send you an email - I just listened to your Conversations with P'taah that you did with Mickey and with Jules. Lots of very good points. I was glad to see that you brought up some of the subjects that you and I have discussed.
Some notes I took:
To be frustrated is to be in non-understanding of the nature of reality.
The more you require a definition the more you are requiring a limitation.
Will we perceive the same earth? Each of us already do.
This is not about the mind and yes, it is arrogant (to think Westerners will take the lead.)
Our lives allow us to practice to have the mind set to allow us to feel for the "pearl" and to come to know more of who we are (love). It's not about the outside story, and that means anything from the body on out.
The reason to learn more about you is to find out what the beliefs are that keep you from loving who you are as the perfect expression of Source.
Do not allow it to be unbearable. As you are filled with compassion for people who are having difficult times, even for the power brokers - it's not so terrible. Compassion allows you to reach out and nurture and allow each their divine right to their story.
Honor others divine right to believe what they want, to be who they are, and to not yourself be attached to any outcome.
At the very end I heard you say something about it being lonely. This statement, and your statement about wanting to preach to people so they would get it, and about it being frustrating and unbearable to go back to 3rd density after being in 4th density, are speaking to an aspect you have yet to embrace within you entirely. And in truth, I have as yet to embrace within myself (entirely) as well.
We have to realize my friend, that when we learn to love who we are, there is no loneliness or unbearableness there. We know ourselves as love, and that is all-encompassing. We allow. We venture forth to find Christ within everyone, even those we think are so far from the truth as the east is to the west. Ultimately it comes to recognizing ourselves as the Christ... as P'taah puts it, it comes to recognizing ourselves as the perfect eternal expression of Source. Which again, is love. When we immerse ourselves in that KNOWING, all else will be given unto us. Put first the Kingdom, and all else follows. Put first the love that is within you, expressed to others in your allowance and honoring of who they are, and the peace that passeth all understanding is remembered in you.
If you are feeling lonely and that something is unbearable, that is your moment to stop and ask yourself what is it that I'm not allowing here, either in myself, in the other, or in both. Ask yourself, "what would love do?" And then BE that love. Simple really. Not always easy, but as we practice, it becomes easier, because we become more free. It becomes 'delicious' to use P'taah's word. It does take some practice. It also takes the desire to practice it.
Do you see this point? It's an important one for you and for all of us.
Much love, Chris
P.S. I'm placing this email to you on the board also, because I think it will be useful. Since the Conversations you did with P'taah was public, I don't feel that you will mind. As P'taah said in the tape, these questions that are asked are questions that we all have, and the answer applies as well to all.
Having also been a very intent preacher to the "ignorants" (and still dealing with that part of mine) I would like to share what I found out about myself: I feel this urge to tell others what to do or how to live their life better when it is mostly about a topic that I myself feel I should understand better and have not quite come to grasps with it. An interesting point for me was to find out WHY I wanted other people to understand my way of thinking better; it usually was because I had the feeling "if everyone understood me, I wouldn`t be so lonely", "if XY would see the world the way I see it, I would get along better with them" or something along those lines. So this was more about myself feeling not worthy of love than anything else.
My current thoughts on this are: There are billions of people in this world, each one with their own mindset. To think that everyone should think the same way as I do would be taking the diversity out of this world. Everyone will create their own paths for the development of their consciousness, how they do it is none of my business. I am there as a compassionate being and will support them as I support myself, but I will only give advice if I feel that it is wanted and appropriate. I will speak from the heart as much as I can. You see, if you think that everybody should have an understanding about energy, 2012, UFOs or any such thing, you are denying the development to anyone who has never heard these things. Native people living in the wilderness, atheists, christians, muslims, alcoholics, politicians wouldn't have any opportunity of development. But they do have it. People who have reached "enlightenment", be it in Buddhism or any other faith, would never have heard about the things that we occupy ourselves with, and yet they still were able to gain knowledge far beyond our everyday understanding of how life works. It made me realise that what I had chosen to be my path is my path only, nobody else has to walk it, but I don't have to be lonely when I truly honour everyone`s divine right to their own path.
As I said, this is still something that is the work of art in progress for me, but I wanted to share what I had found out so far.
I've placed a small part of your email reply to me below. I've taken out the other parts that weren't relevant to this subject.
"Dear Chris, "Thanks so much for the lovely words and of course it is fine to publish on forum. Yes, it was great to talk to P'Taah though a little more challenging with another person present too, there were 4 of us on the line! I used the word unbearable for dramatic effect really - it is usually not unbearable it is what it is as an American lady I once worked with in korea kept on saying when she was feeling pissed! - thank God, just feels a bit grotty as we say after the highs of 4th density and innate blssifulness and lovingness that seems to go with that."
I want to preface my reply to you by saying that everything I've said in this thread, and that I'm going to say to you now, applies absolutely the same to me. I am learning this stuff as I go along. I get it deeper and deeper. But I want you to know, these words are meant entirely for me, and anyone else who might find that they apply as well. Also, I may be wrong in interpreting your email as trying to deflect your statement of 'unbearable' as being said for dramatic effect, and therefore it's not really all that unbearable - downplaying the feeling is how I intrepret your email (above). I may be wrong in this, in which case, just ignore what I'm about to say. I say it for myself at any rate, as it all applies to me. I believe these words might apply to anyone who feels at some times depression, who feels unhappy, who feels despair.
Would you deny the dark places within that now are crying for the light?
Would you pretend you didn't really mean "unbearable" and thereby deny your pain?
Can a dark place become illumined without bringing it to the light?
If you deny the feeling of 'unbearable' is there, are you keeping that feeling in the dark to crouch in an unknown corner growing spindley arms that reach out to choke you and cause you more pain, again and again?
You said it was unbearable. There is no need to disguise this. Feel how unbearable it is, and then seek the truth.
My thought and belief that this illusory world of separation is real and my insistence that it's real causes my unhappiness. Think on this for a moment - every time you feel unhappy, is there not found a dependence on the illusion of some outer 'story'? And recall P'taah's words in your October Conversations of "outer story" being anything from the body on out into the rest of the physical universe.
The world means nothing Alan. We have never left our home in God. We're already there and have never left. This world is a dream. There is difficulty in humans understanding this. But I will not get any further in understanding this if I do not take responsibility for what I feel, and then really, really feel it. Eventually, I figure out there's more truth to be assimilated, more love to practice and more responsibility to take. Actually, taking responsibility is first in that line-up. It's so important, which is why I'm emphasizing it here, not the least but for myself. Without it, we do not progress on the path. It is essential. P'taah puts it first in his 4 Keys to Transformation. Take responsibility. Then feel the feeling.
It's a key to our recognition of our true Self Alan. Taking responsibility and feeling the feeling are actually gifts, no matter how seemingly unbearable, without which we do not awaken from the dream. They let us shine the light in those dark corners. Yet to shine that light, you have to acknowledge and feel the feeling. Feeling the feeling will allow you to take the next step, which is to understand that you have a belief and a thought that precedes your feeling of unhappiness or depression or unbearableness, and that thought is based on fear and the false belief in separation. Which is illusion. Those thoughts are that you are powerless, live in an unsafe universe, that love equals pain, and that you're unworthy of love. All of which are false. But they are at the bottom of the thoughts and beliefs WE HOLD that keep us tied to a self-created limitation called the ego, and which cause our unhappiness... the unbearableness of believing we are separate.
I'm ready to change that belief. I'm ready to allow the unbearableness to melt away. Let us abide then, in peace, and let us learn that all we truly are is Love. Let us shine the light that illumines any dark corner previously repressed. Thanks for helping me with this lesson Alan. It's one I'm only just beginning to learn, and am so grateful to be learning it.
You make some very good points. I'm afraid I've spent some time doing a little preaching tonight aka my posting above. But I wanted to add here, that your points are well taken. I have to agree with all this being a work in progress for me as well. Yes, yes, yes on your other points also.
Nighty night my friend. It's 1:20 a.m. here, and time for me to slumber. In London, where you are, it's 9:20 a.m. I wish you a lovely good morning, and I hope you have a hot plate now so you can cook some eggs. Lots of love, Chris
"Dear Chris, So moving thank you thank you, I have tears in my eyes. Yes, I guess there was a touch of denial embarrassment about the use of unbearable, we all have to be brave you know put on a brave face stiff upper lip, partic. us gents and us Brits (oh double whammy!).... We are in a mad mad situation and the tears reflect at your beautiful and poignant rarely honest writing."
It's Chris now - thanks Alan, for your honesty and for telling me that my sensing was correct. We are in a mad situation, particularly since the ego is quite literally mad. What could be more mad than to believe in fear, separation, judgment of others and of ourselves, and that we are not worthy of love, when in fact that's exactly what we are! Love!
Fortunately though, that "mad situation" is a dream. An illusion we've imagined, and we have never been anything but the perfect, eternal extension and expression of Source. 'Waking up' from the dream simply means becoming aware of that, and acknowledging the truth of it.
Thanks again for your honesty and willingness to take responsibility my friend. I knew you would, and I knew I would - we are blessed indeed. We are one.
Dear Chris and Phil, Many many thanks for your great posts very moving and true. Puts things in perspective for me. Phil, your description is so great thanks and of course very true, yet part of me still thinks well wouldn't it be nice if....? There is already one concensus reality, that is so much of everyday life and media and socialized perceptions we don't even think about and ways of doing things we subscribe to, I guess I still yearn for a world of greater more palpable unity in diversity so to speak. I guess my sometimes painful feelings arise when I see so little what I would call authentic communication going on between beings that are already One in Truth (what a paradox that is!). I think a time will come when univeral truths will be self evident to the vast majority and we will celebrate these each in our own way, for even now within a monolith like Christian or Buddhist or any shared belief there are myriad of variations and approaches, Truth is one but we each have our pathway and ways of expressing it, our own unique slightly different way up the mountain. There's a new age community in Scotland where I went many moons ago and it had a lovely hall, mostly just empty, in the middle called Universal Hall where people would go and meditate etc. I thought how lovely. The temple. churches of the future? You see the way things are now people are often violently alienated and divided from each other by what they believe, I know I can't 'fix' that but it still makes me sad at times, Nevertheless I try to take P'Taah's advice and not worry too much about it and resepct others paths no matter what but I certainly have my preferences and it's gerat to hang with folk one can really talk to and actually be understood! ...
